Okay, I know in my very last post I said I’d stay on topic, but I guess I lied.  This is off-topic but I need some support. 

I just found out my best friend’s mom has terminal cancer.  We’ve known she had cancer for about two weeks, but he just found out today that it’s extremely agressive and she may only have three months left.  This woman has been a tremendously important part of my life for the last six years.  I’m going back home on Wednesday, and I’ll be there for a week and a half.  (Thankfully it’ll be reading week, so no classes.)

I have no idea what I’m asking for, beyond good wishes and maybe for advice from people who have been in similar situations.

Julie

Julie - I am so sorry about your friend’s mom and really glad that you will get to go home and spend some time with her.  Take care and remember that the Coffee Shoppe is for conversations of every kind, including getting support on issues completely unrelated to diet and exercise.  We’re your newest friends but we’re all here for you.

Laura

Julie,

So sorry to hear this.  What a hard situation to have to deal with.  Many years ago I had an aunt that passed away with Leukemia within about a year of being diagnosed.  She was in her lower to mid 40’s at the time.  She had 3 children one who was only 12 and two that were around 18 at the time.  It’s hard to imagine what it would be like to have something like that happen to your own mother.  I guess my advice would be to be the best friend that you can possibly be.  Talk about things when your friend wants to talk about them.  Maybe take him or her to a movie or some place they can escape for awhile.  Your friend’s life is going to be focused on this for awhile now, so as many escapes you can give them the better off they will be. 

Julie, if you need anything we are definately here for you!  Take care.  Breathe.  Cry if you need.  It will pass!

Best,

Ron

Julie - 10 February 2006 07:25 PM

I have no idea what I’m asking for, beyond good wishes and maybe for advice from people who have been in similar situations.

Julie

Hi Julie,

I am Scott’s wife and this is my first post (ever), so please excuse me if I don’t get this in quite the right place.

I want to let you know that I am thinking of you, your best friend’s Mom and her family.  I recently lost my sister and a few years back lost my mother, so I know this can be a challenging time for you.  It will also be an opportunity for growth.  Just remember to be gentle with yourself… in addition to getting some physical exercise, take time to do some centering/balancing activity.  Listening to a meditation tape or a favorite CD that makes you feel calmed goes a long way toward keeping you healthy through a stressful process like this.  For me… a walk in the park and soaking up nature’s energy is very grounding.  Be careful to avoid the urge to destress with overeating or junk foods… that only creates a situation where your body creates more stress, which makes your already frayed emotions more erratic.  You will feel a lot more in control or helpful as a calming influence for those around you if you nourish YOUR mind, body and spirit first.  I am a Reiki practitioner (Energy healing for mind/body/spirit) and if you like, I will send distance healing energy your way.  And if you care to give me your friend’s mother’s name, I will include her in the “Distance Healing Network"” which uses volunteers from many healing modalities from all over the world that send energy to people in need.  (Somehow it seems fitting since this internet forum is connecting us, too.)

Take Care of yourself,
Sheryl

Thanks, everyone.  I appreciate the support.  Sheryl, welcome to MTM.  My friend’s mom is a private person, and I don’t think she’s appreciate my passing her name along.  Thank you for the thought, and I’m sure the healing energies will go where they need to.

Thanks again,
Julie