There’s a lot I could be doing today as I wait for my husband to get done with work so we can go to my sister’s for Christmas but I’m having a hard time getting anything productive done. I went over to mom’s house this morning to get something to take to Jersey (she’s already there) and happened to check her answering machine--just in case.

The message on her machine said that my aunt has broken her hip and she was going in for surgery. Unfortunately, Mom’s answering machine doesn’t give the date or time of the message. My aunt (her sister) is 94 years old and had congestive heart failure before Thanksgiving. This is the sister she’s closest to. (Three siblings out of 6 are still alive.) Mom and I have plane tickets to fly to Texas to see her sister on January 22nd. . . . . I’ve been worried that she wouldn’t make it until then and that was before a broken hip.

I’m definitely in a conflict of obligations. My husband didn’t want me to go right after the New Year because his work partner will be on vacation for several weeks and he’ll have to work a lot and he wants to be able to call me in if things get crazy. He’s not being particularly selfish because he does get quite anxious when short-staffed and there was no way to predict what would happen with my aunt. There’s still no way to predict. .  . .

If my mother doesn’t know, I’m not going to tell her until the morning after Christmas. She has trouble sleeping already. . ..

I realize that I’m very lucky to have relatives who are so old. Recognizing the longevity in our family is part of what finally got me moving towards fitness. But the age of our loved ones as they reach the end of their journey is not much of a comfort.

I just got a call and my aunt made it through the surgery last night and should be out of intensive care some time today. So far so good. What a relief!

However, the person I talked to has very different values from mine. I was told basically that we were coming at a bad time because my aunt’s house would be being cleaned out to sell her things and put the house on the market and the person wouldn’t have time to go to dinner or do anything with us. The preference was that we come at the end of March. . . .  I responded that I promised my aunt I’d come visit and that I’d bring my mother and I promised my mother that we’d go and that I needed to keep those promises. I brought up the previous heart failure and she made light of it. Accurate diagnosis or not, my aunt is under hospice. . . . I’m not going to wait until March because it’s inconvenient for us to come in January.

One can’t work 24/7 (as much as I try to at times). How can THINGS be more important than people??? My aunt would like the help of the cash from the sale to pay for the assisted living but I got the impression that my aunt has been disturbed by this reaction. My aunt is NOTHING like this. She and my uncle drove hundreds of miles to get to my college graduation and she has always stayed in touch even after she moved to Texas.

Deep breath. . .

Oh, wow, Joan. What a crappy situation. I’ll be praying for your aunt to have a wonderful recovery. And I completely agree that you should keep your promise and go when you are planning on.

Love the pictures, as always. I read about Petra in a Christian book series. Sounds amazing. Oh the places I want to go.

Bree

And have a very Merry Christmas!

Bree

What an amazing trip.  It sounds like it was a lot of fun and very informative.  The pictures were great!

I hope you get a chance to visit with your aunt.  The people in your life are so important. 

Keep us informed of how things go, and I’m wishing for the best for you and your family.

I am so hoping for a less stressful year in 2008.

I just got reminded of how much stress my husband’s switch of employer caused this past year. I’m trying to file things because we’re having good friends to dinner tonight and I’d like the house as neat as is reasonable (they are good friends). Our files are a mess and way too thick. The point is that my husband had one health insurance from Jan to July 1st and then the employer changed plans and he had new insurance starting July 1st but then the store changed hands on July 10th so then he had all new insurance plans (and FSA and 401K). I’m very grateful for these benefits but the confusion and paperwork was/is overwhelming.

I just spent time tracking down an explanation of benefits which had held up filing a claim for the health benefits account; I had totally forgotten that the claim wasn’t filed.

Meanwhile I haven’t even figured out what I’m cooking for dinner. UGH.

(I came to the computer to copy the EOB.)

I don’t know that I can say that 2008 has started off as less stressful--but it has started off with a bang.

I’ve ended up subbing for a friend. Eight days in a row has tested my endurance. A click happened this morning though when I realized that I worked that week+ without the normal aching legs that I usually had each September when school started. Yeah to being in better physical shape! I’m not working Monday or Tuesday or this weekend (at the other job) so I have a chance to retrench.

I got the garage swept today which anyone in snow country can understand. All the road dirt was coming into the house but because of the January thaw the floor was dry so I could sweep it. It’s supposed to snow again Sunday night so we can start all over again. . .

I can’t describe how excited I am over two things. At a party last night my doctor came up to my husband and me to comment on how fit and “hot” I am looking. (Not his exact words, but his point.) He said I looked “defined” and I wasn’t even in anything particularly form-fitting or revealing. That was good motivation.

And today I weighed 155. That’s the first time that I’ve seen that number in 12 years. Now I know that I’ll bounce back up again (because my weight always fluctuates) but I’m getting further and further away from the 160s. My highs recently have been 158. Twelve years ago I weighed 154 after being on a restrictive diet to fix some intestinal/food intolerance issues. When I get below 154, I won’t know how long ago I weighed that because I will be beyond recent memory.

Here’s to new memories!

Tomorrow Mom and I leave for Texas to visit her sister, my aunt. This is going to be an emotionally difficult trip.

Mom called me and told me this afternoon that her sister told her she wants us to come to where she is tomorrow no matter what the time. She’s not doing well. She’s going to her doctor tomorrow but doesn’t think there’s anything she can do.

I think my aunt is getting closer and closer to dying although I could be being a pessimist as my aunt doesn’t have any disease that is life-threatening. However, she’s 94 years old, in a lot a pain from her osteoporosis, under 80 pounds and on oxygen at least some of the time. I’ll find out more tomorrow. She has fractured many verterbrae over the past few years and broke her hip Christmas Eve.

My aunt and mother used to go on walking tours. They went to England, France, and Utah together. My aunt traveled extensively with her husband before he died.

My aunt is also competitive and literate. She participated in book reading contests AND in races where she lives. As far as the races go, she often won but she downplayed her success with the comment that no one else her age was participating. And wasn’t that a success???

Wow, I know how she got to be 94! Amazing!

Bree

You have some amazing women in your family.  I can see where you get your energy.  I hope things go well on your trip.

The hard part is how emaciated and older my aunt looks.

The good part was that she didn’t recognize me for a minute because I’ve changed so much since she last saw me a year and a half ago. At least my change was positive.

I’m glad she finally did recognize you, and that your changes are positive.  It’s hard to watch people we’ve known and loved grow older.  It’s good that you take the time to visit and I’m sure it is appreciated.

Thanks for the encouragement Paula. In some ways I’m ready to go home today. I can’t remember when I ever spent so much time sitting around. It’s not my style.  At the same time, I’m dreading our leave-taking on Sunday morning.

The leave-taking wasn’t that bad. Since then my aunt has been in the hospital for pneumonia and gotten back out to her assisted living apartment.

I’m frustrated at my lack of weight loss despite finally actually trying to lose two pounds.

I did do something productive today. I cleaned out our pantry and threw out everything that was outdated. Everything’s been washed and reorganized. Now at least we’ll know what we have. There are a few more things that probably could go but now that I have empty space they can stay a while. For example, I kept the lasagne pasta even though I haven’t made any in years. Our meals have changed. We’ve been in this house for almost 20 years so it’s understandable why some items were hiding in the back of the closet!

I have a strong suspicion that our bodies hold onto fat more in the winter as a survival mechanism. If we don’t workout, we’d naturally gain weight, so by losing only a little, or maintaining, you’re winning. And since you are so close to your ideal, at least you look that way, you will have a harder time losing it. I could be wrong, but that just seems to be the way of it.

Bree