I need motivation more then ever. 
My father’s health is fading.  He will only be turning 50 this year.  He has something called Moya Moya which is a vascular disorder.  He had surgery 7 years ago to help but now there are too many complications to risk it so we just have to keep an eye on him.  It’s really hard.  I don’t like knowing that he won’t be around.  There was no time limit.  Just depends on when his body gives up, but I need motivation now more then ever to get myself healthy. 
It will be too easy to give in and say no I can’t work out today.  No I won’t eat healthy today.  But I want to.  I don’t want to give up!! So hopefully with your help I will be able to stick to my word. 
Thank you.

Danita

Hi Danita,

I’m really sorry to hear of your father’s health problems. That is a very difficult time when are parents are unwell. We have a few members on the forum who are going through something similar. My dad had 2 heart attacks nearly 20 years ago. Fortunately he survived, but it has been a good lesson for me to take care of myself.

You will be the greatest help and support for your dad if you are healthy. If you eat well and exercise, you will be better able physically and mentally to cope with this stressful time.

Have you started a 100 day challenge? If not, it is a really good way to be accountable for healthy habits, plus you will get support for yourself.

Keeping you and your family in my prayers.

Hi Danita

I know exactly how you feel! My dad’s health was deteriorating for more than 15 years before finally passing away. Every few months he would get worse and have to go to hospital and the doctors would tell us to prepare for the worst. He would get better and come home but in a few more months the same thing again. To see him slowly deteriorate over those 15 years was one of the hardest thing I have ever had to go through.

What helped me at the time was to set myself goals to look forward to a happier future and not focus on the darker side. For example I wanted to go to Australia (I am French) so I took English lessons after work. When I passed the final exam I was so happy and he was so proud! It’s amazing how little achivements can do for your moral as well as his.

I don’t know your situation but I am pretty sure that he would be very proud to see you take care of your health and be as strong as you can be. Also a good workout can help you get rid of some frustration while yoga or Pilates can help you to focus and cope with more emotional things.

Starting a thread in the 100 days challenge or in the journal section is a great way to get a whole lot of support when you need it.

Take care of yourself

Hi Danita, what would your father want you to do? Would your father want you to be the healthiest you can be? This is a great time to value your own health while taking care of someone elses.  Best wishes for you and your family during this time.

Danita - I am so sorry to hear about your Father. I can only imagine how difficult it is for you. Perhaps you need to look at your exercise time this way - as a time to have alone time and de-stress - it is a great stress reducer for me. Zookie has a good point - how would your father want you to feel? I know he would want you to be the healthiest you can be. You are in my thoughts as you go through this difficult time.

Danita

I’m sorry to hear about your father.  After my mom passed, my dad was my only family.  I had moved to Florida and he relocated to be close to me.  Over the 10 years that I lived there, his health gradually deteriorated.  It was hard to see the person who once took care of me becoming so dependent.  You do need to remember that he would want you to be happy and healthy.  Letting your own needs go will not help him and will only add additional stress to your life.  You and your dad both deserve a healthy and fit “you”.

Hi Danita,

I’m so sorry to hear about your father’s health problems.  I just lost my Dad this past March.  He was almost 82 and had been battling cancer for about a year, so it wasn’t unexpected.  Your father is so young that I’m sure it makes it that much harder for you to see him sick.

I started my first 100 Days Challenge only a few days after my father went into Intensive Care.  It was amazing what a difference it made for me to come here to the MTM Forum every day, day in and day out, to post my frustrations in my journal and my exercise in my 100 Days thread.  I felt so supported by all of these people I had never met in person, and who I had only just met online days before.

To be honest with you, I wouldn’t worry about eating for comfort right now.  If that’s what it takes to give you some comfort, then I say comfort yourself.  But I’d also say, keep exercising regularly.  It can really help burn off the stress and frustration and all of those other so-called “negative” emotions that come up. 

Just keep posting and doing what you can when you can.  And know that we’re holding you in our thoughts and prayers.

Hi Danita. I know what you’re going through. My dad passed earlier this year. It was such a hard time.

I didn’t exercise during that time, but I did start listening to fitness podcasts including the MTM ones. It got me in the right frame of mind so that when I was ready to start, I had a very clear idea of what I wanted to do and how I was going to do it.

Although I didn’t exercise regularly, I did have a hobby which I worked on every single day. Sometimes it felt like a chore, or I felt guilty about doing that and not spending my little free time on something else like cleaning house, etc. But looking back, I realize it was that daily habit which kept me grounded. Doing something just for me and no one else--that was also important.

Watching my dad lose his health made me more determined than ever to get healthy and stay healthy--not just for myself, but for my loved ones too. And since I’ve started working out regularly, I’ve noticed my mood improving and my sleep improving too. If I’d known this before, I would have made exercise a daily habit much sooner.

So, do what you can, but try to do something for yourself every day, whether it’s exercise, hobbies, or cooking yourself a nice healthy meal. You will spend time helping your dad and keeping him company--that’s a given, so don’t worry about taking time away from that. You won’t.